Immature

fight club

have you ever feel like this is a very strange time in your life? not knowing whether you are already a woman or still a girl, feel messy, insecure of almost everything, feel like having bipolar disorder? your life seem so strange to you, not knowing the state that you should stand on. phew, so immature huh?
yeah, I feel that things right now and it's really disturb me. I feel so worry about almost everything. I feel like a low quality human being. I am so sorry for people that meet me in this very strange time.
I secretly want (now it's not secret anymore since I post it here) that I don't meet new people right now because I'm not ready. I'm not ready for having new friend because I feel so disgusting. It maybe a very weird wish, but this is really hard to explain anyway.